Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Future Lifetime Movie ~ It All Leads to This...Book Review by Frankie

It All Leads to This
By Tessa Brookfield

A Book Review
By Frankie Brazelton
7 out of 10 Muddy Crowns

Future Lifetime Movie ~ It All Leads to This

Let me begin my review by saying, politely, that Romance is not really my genre. This particular romance novel found its way into my hands, and ultimately, into my heart.

From the first few chapters, I perceived this story about Hailey Deegan and her disgraceful past to be the archetypical romance story: girl makes reprehensible decisions, attempts to start a new life, girl meets well-to-do overly handsome guy, whirlwind romance ensues, guy discovers shameful past, and they kiss and make up, then live happily ever after. My perception, however, proved to be entirely misjudged.

Yes, Brookfield’s novel is most definitely a love story, but it’s so much more. Rather than handing you a synopsis of this arresting and dramatic tale, I invite you to discover for yourself a fantasy of amorous trysts, unyielding friendship, conquered challenges and most importantly: love. Lost love, found love, and love of self. You’ll encounter more than one overtly delicious male love interest. You’ll be whisked into tantalizing sex scenes. The ending, surprisingly, will turn your world upside down and leave you crying, ugly faced, with happy tears. Yep, I’m talking Niagara fucking falls.

 Hailey Deegan is a character to inspire; champion for the wayward, proving that redemption and happiness are possible even for the most delinquent and lost among us.  

Friday, February 13, 2015

Fifty Shades of……Vanilla: A Fifty Shades of Grey movie review By Frankie Brazelton

Fifty Shades of……Vanilla
A Fifty Shades of Grey movie review
By Frankie Brazelton
4 out of 10 Muddy Crowns

Fans of E.L. James’ wildly successful Fifty Shades of Grey novel have been anticipating a film adaption since the phenomenon began. Right from the start women have fantasized about their dream cast and the plausibility of getting to see their favorite erotica titillate them through the magic of the silver screen. After viewing the film myself last night, I think I can safely say that there are going to be hoards of disappointed women flocking to their social media outlets to bash this film and exclaim their utter disdain.

Personally, I found the movie so boring that it evoked something worse than hatred: complete apathy; no emotion what-so-ever. It gave me neither excitement nor displeasure. It failed to arouse me, or repulse me. For a story supposedly based on a budding BDSM relationship, it was quite vanilla. {Queue the uproar of rabid fans}
The lack of chemistry between Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson) and Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan) was palpable to anyone who didn’t fall asleep watching the movie. Honestly, I am a fan of the books because…well the sex is great, but it’s also highly detailed by E.L. James. Though the novels are fantastically entertaining and arousing, as evidenced by their massive popularity, we all know it’s not for the writing. Just as men across the globe read Playboy for the “articles”, women read Fifty for the “mommy porn”. Taking an erotica that wholly owes its success to the explicit BDSM sex, and attempting to transform it into an R rated movie (seriously not even NC17!), well…all you have left is the story…a poorly written love story and a poorly written script that yield, you guessed it: vanilla. It’s not particularly off putting, but not especially exciting or appetizing either.